Every once in a while…
No one has said anything in particular, and this post is definitely not a response to some outlandish comment made. I just sense something, just an undertone of recent months,
…and so I write.
Care to listen for a bit?
You know ladies, my life isn’t perfect. Life presented here isn’t fake by any means — it’s true and real, and we actually do live this way. I highly value trying to keep a peaceful home, offering my family the best of me, and yes…I’m a fairly organized person.
We intentionally craft abundant room for family, for sharing and learning together. This role in my home – this wife, mother role – well, it’s my life’s work.
I love it. I was created for this I’m convinced.
Sometimes, I’m overwhelmed by my roles…just like you. Sometimes, I don’t want to read aloud to another child, start dinner, or clean out another closet.
Sometimes... my job is mundane, difficult and stretches me in ways beyond what I feel I’m able. There’s dirty laundry, dirty dishes, unfinished projects, disobedient children. I fall behind (or fall completely off) my original thoughts and goals, and I too fall into the deadly trap of comparing myself.
Sometimes, I’m not a very good mom or wife at all, and I have to apologize and seek forgiveness.
And in the middle of mothering and wifely roles, I’m called to a congregation. To a local one and to an online community who also find priority in my heart. Because God says ‘yes’ and I must to honor Him. It’s not my expectation every woman is asked to, but I know I am.
The road isn’t always pretty, and I don’t always feel excitement about this side of ministry outside my home. The blog takes time, supporting my husband as a pastor and the church takes focus and vice versa.
Sometimes, I drop the ball in these areas too. I miss deadlines, disappoint others, and fall short.
Oh this is not a pity party, not at all. But it is a reality party. Welcome?
I’m a real person, with real struggles just like every other Mama or woman out there who’s strong enough to admit weakness.
My life isn’t superior or inferior to those around me, and I would hope you see this reflected in my words. Yes, I blog primarily about the loveliness, the grace, the beauty in our lives; the way my faith moves me, how my God loves me.
This too is intentional.
For this is a journal, albeit a public one, of those aspects. Not the ‘sometimes’ moments. This sets the stage for others to think it’s always this way, but I hope you would understand — life in this space is simply a snapshot of the numerous daily moments lived out.
And we are friends on the journey, yes? I appreciate your compliments — they are so incredibly encouraging! Um, please don’t stop :)…but know we walk side-by-side.
I’m not alone in this! We each run our own race, but together we run collectively for the glory of God.
It’s for Him, it’s all for Him. He takes our ‘sometimes’ moments and makes them into beautiful things so we find strength to carry on. And this is just what we should do.
And sometimes…that’s all we really need to know.